Tag Archives: hard times

Those n-word folk are everywhere

Earlier this week, the entire region was glued to their media devices watching a car chase that began in the city of Camden.  It’s not surprising that that was the case since, most times, as soon as people hear “Camden, New Jersey” they’re automatically thinking the direst of circumstances have occurred.

See the story, videos and photos here and here.

What was interesting was one of the comments in the forum section of one of the news articles.  It read, “Niggers-the main reason for police overtime”.  (I’m writing from memory but the gist is the same and apparent).  I automatically became offended thinking that the person was directing a not-so-subtle insult towards African Americans.  But as the day wore on and I heard more and more individuals go whispering down the lane adding to the rampant rumor mill, I became less so as I realized something.

I realized that niggers were everywhere.  I’d always known it, having been raised to understand that the word nigger was not solely to describe any one color but for me, yesterday was a sea change moment.  As I looked at the pictures of the “Bonnie & Clyde” duo, I realized then that niggers, too, could be of the “beautiful” people. (Well, maybe they’re not so beautiful now.  See updated story and photos here.)  It occurred to me that niggers are like that all-inclusive drink offered at your favorite vacation spot.  They come in all flavors, shapes and sizes.

Niggers ride the buses and trains with you; they have commuter passes and tickets.  They work with you.  They’re those toxic employees who are the broke spokes on the wheels of your business constantly causing your commerce to skip rather than roll efficiently along.  You possibly meet them every day at the check-out counter when you purchase goods, evident in the level of customer service given.  Niggers are smart and savvy not the insipid, shuffling ignorant fools depicted on screen and in print.  And sometimes, it’s even more disturbing to discover that niggers are your friends.

From this, I’ve come away with some newly found ideas about the whole nigger/n-word thing and where we, not as African Americans but simply as Americans, go from here.  I think it’s time to shed the weight of the past; the heaviness, not the memory.  We must, all of us, hold on to the memory to use as a teaching moment for future generations.  But the weight of words and attitudes long used and felt, yet recently re-defined however incorrectly, has us as African Americans still pre-occupied with that same bygone era. To move forward into a brighter tomorrow, where hate and racism seek to become standards of a yesteryear, we must re-educate the country about what the word nigger truly means.  In doing so, we’ll find that it’s not only us but them, as well.

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Money worries perpetuate themselves, create stress

In other words, if you have money, you worry about keeping and maintaining money.  It’s a simple truth; uncomplicated yet elusive.  But the quicker you accept that fact the faster you’ll become more prepared to deal and survive in these still unforgiving economic times.

It’s been three years since my spouse was laid off from her job.  Actually, she was fired without cause after 16 years and offered no severance package.  No need to go into any further details, since hers is not a unique situation.  Seniors, boomers and other long term employees about ready to cash out and retire, have all had to face the same heartless, and possibly unscrupulous, tactics put forth by employers under the guise of catchy new age names, like re-structuring and reorganization.

But the verdict was in, and the deed was done.  As she draws nearer to that glorious end day (early retirement), we try to relax as we’ve become somewhat accustomed to the ebb and flow of our savings.  We discovered that preparation was essential and can’t imagine these past few years without the help of both of our companies 401K and savings plans.  Since her separation, we’ve utilized funds from both in an effort to keep our proverbial heads above the waters of abject poverty.  But in doing so, as we watched our savings account accumulate and deplete routinely over time, we’ve realized a few things.

As the sole bread winner, I’ve experienced many a sleepless night these past 411 days as the stress from our situation plagues me; my wife as well, I’m sure.  But as our dollar amount decreased, my stress level took an unexpected downturn.  It seems that once the money was gone (or almost gone) then so too was the pressure associated with holding on to it.  It became, more simply, a matter of survival and no longer one of maintaining wealth (however meager), in addition to survival.  Still, losing money in an effort to combat stress is not the sole answer to the problem.  There are other things to be done in order to maintain good mental and physical health.

Keeping a positive attitude, above all else I think, is important.  Be thankful for what you have and not what you want (or need, for that matter).  You have to know and trust in yourself (if you’re an Atheist) and/or the Lord (if you’re a Christian) that you will be OK; that you and yours will make it despite whatever befalls you.   Get plenty of rest and exercise.   Maintain a healthy diet; your mind will follow the lead of your body.  In other words, if your body is healthy and happy, an unhappy mind is a bit harder to sustain.  Jump-start your metabolism by drinking plenty of water and eating multiple servings of fruits and green vegetables daily.   Sounds corny and routine but trust me, it helps.  Have fun, as much as you can under the circumstances.  Carry on a good sex life.  Do things together as a family; take walks, go on picnics.  There’s free stuff out there to do in life that’s mentally rewarding.  Do what it takes to take your mind off your economic circumstances for a short while.  Finally, pay yourself first.  This oft-times touted accountant’s directive takes on a new meaning in these troublesome times.   For me, it means prioritizing my spending with emphasis on me and mine and our happiness and well-being.

Now, I’m not saying that you should stop paying your bills but rather that you find a complimentary mid-point where doing so doesn’t hurt so much.  Look to slow that monthly hemorrhaging of cash from your wallet by reducing that cable or smart phone bill.  In the wake of so many Wall Street bail-outs and ever increasing legislator’s salaries, tax loopholes for the rich and the damaging political stalemate in Washington, I find thinking about my survival and contentment, along with my wife’s before anything else, a very easy thing to do.

“There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever.”

Gandhi

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